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Starting over

So this is a rant blog ( as they all are)

2017 has not treated me well. I had this weird idea that because I was turning 28 on the 28th, things would be golden *insert sparkles and glitter*

Ha. What a joke. Things have been worse than ever.

If you have been creeping on my Facebook, then you've probably seen the fiasco that is my personal life. While I would love to talk about it, I feel that it deserves a blog of it's own, so right now, I'm just going to give you the SparkNotes version.

I left a relationship in which I was abused in several ways (still dealing with court things so we aren't going to talk about it too much), I  got diagnosed with PTSD, and then quit everything: my job, my church,  my board member positions, my apartment, my car, my "friends" my family; basically anything that was toxic for me. I moved back to Minneapolis with an awesome friend and got a stress free brainless part time job to pay the bills. I dumped some abusive friends who were not there for me when I needed them. I got super broke and got a payday loan and then freaked out because all the money just came out and now  still I'm super broke, BUT I'm happy  a lot more resilient and happier than before.  So that's why I'm blogging.  To have a place to vent out my frustrations but also share with the world ( I love sharing).  I'm excited to just write this down so I feel like I'm doing something. And yes I did apply for jobs and yes I do know that McDonald is always hiring but I'm looking for something stress free. stress free. 

Basically I'm starting over. I feel like I've crashed and burned and out of the ashes a phoenix arose. After quitting my full time job ( which was the job of my dreams) I learned so much about my self and I healed so much about myself that was broken by others. I'm still healing and  I'm learning that  healing takes time and I can't rush it so I might as well just embrace it and surrender to it.   I need to have a good foundation, a sturdy one that's not built on appearances or worrying about what others think.

I'm hoping that the next series of blogs will be about the healing process, journey to recovery, lessons I've learned and mistakes I've made. My hope is that in opening up my heart and sharing with you my vulnerabilities, you can pick up the bits and pieces that apply to you along the way.

This blog isn't fancy, it isn't glittered with gold, it's  just real. And it's all me.